Ever since my little meltdown the other night I've been smiling non-stop again. I clearly be fooling myself when I let people stay around and be a part of my life knowing that they are essentially not good for me.
For instance, I used to mess with a man I had no business messing with, and even though we had toned down our little affair to a mere friendship I was still bothered. Because not only do we work together now, but he is a faculty member at the college I now attend.
So, the other night, I let it all go. I deleted him from everything he was a part of. Facebook, the old cell (he will not get the new number), twitter... and everything else I could think of. So he had to go!
I feel better because holding on to him was like holding on to false hopes. I had let go of that phase months ago but him still being around wasn't really enough. So he had to go.
I removed some acquaintances and even some "friends." And I feel better.
Hahaha I feel a lot better. School, which I slacked off in at one point is getting better every semester and even though I'm behind I'm getting there.
That's a bit embarrassing but, hey you make your bed you lie in it. Making the best of this situation. I battled so much with what I wanted to do. I contemplated dropping out and moving. I even contemplated moving and going to school elsewhere to take up something completely different.
Man, this has been a rough 4 years. But, its smoothing out nicely. I get more and more excited everyday. Yes there are moments when I get, aggravated and feel like I'm stepping backwards but then I realize, Rome wasn't built in a day, neither was I.
I'm changing everyday and everyday I lose an acquaintance but a true friend remains strong in their stance.
So, here goes everything, because nothing goes nowhere.