Easter Sunday

Church was good, the message was "Let's Talk About It." Which is something I've been needing to do lately.

But I'm not ready. I need to make it through this entire process un-tampered with. I am feeling a little bad about just leaving my best friend and family out of this loop but I had to.

Last time they all tried to talk me out of it and help me fix things but things never really got fixed.

This time I had to just go. Cold turkey l.o.l.

I did get on Facebook today though. Saw that I had millions of notifications and messages but I didn't check them. I only got online to deactivate my account.

When I'm ready to re-join networking world I will but until then here is where I'll be.

I've been toying with the idea of really cutting people off and for that reason, my cell is off. Literally. It sits in my room all day and all night.

I don't take it to work or school anymore. Weird huh? I wonder how many people in the world could live without their cell?

Someone who didn't know me would say I was crazy and being irrational about how I'm handling this part of my life right now.

But someone that really knew me and really knew my struggle and my pain would understand this decision.

Tomorrow is Monday which means I have a lot to do tonight for the week. About to update some other blogs and then smack the books.

I'm getting my writing legs back under me so expect me to lay some stuff on you real soon. Nothing to heavy, but something with a little weight on it.

One love.

Today is going to be a better day. I feel it in my bones. Haven't been as true to my notebook as I should be.

I haven't written anything heavy for a while and I'm at that point where I feel I need to. I'm getting an official divorce from Tumblr since it seems to keep messing up.

Might just move my "Hip-Hop and Other Music" blog to Blogspot, because with only one exception this site has been good to me.

My video blog that I've been running off at the mouth about is finally about to become a reality.

It's nothing to serious yet but, eventually it will get there. Spring Sports Championships this week so I'll be out at the track watching all the events.

You know what show I like watching... Yes, Dear on TBS. It's kind of funny. I plan on looking a mess for the remained of the semester as far as my hair is concerned. Meaning that I will not be getting a blowout before finals.

It's all getting ready to come off and I'm excited! May 16, 2011 is the big day. I can hardly stand it.

Ah well, I have another post or two to write before my 11 o' clock so more later... or tomorrow.

One love.

I haven't been on a social networking site, other than this if you count it, in about two weeks. And I feel good. I needed a break and after breaking down the other day I just felt like I wasn't ready to join the rest of the world yet.

I need a vacation, a serious one. And I want to go by myself. I know it sounds strange but the weight of everything I've been doing and going through these last few weeks is making me tired.

I'm still happy, my joy hasn't left. But I need a break. At 21 I didn't expect to be this stressed. I guess I brought it upon myself but how I don't know. It's like I didn't see this train coming and it just smacked me.

I haven't talked to anyone on the phone in ages, and that's fine with me. I just don't want to be bothered. I needed a break from people.

I don't even hang out on the yard anymore. I walk behind Foster Hall away from everyone and go on about my business.

Work is okay, doing my job and going home. Haven't sang in a while. But I have been vibing to De La Soul and a Tribe Called Quest and Lupe in the mornings.

Kirk Franklin and other gospel greats as soon as I wake up. Kesha and Far East Movement in the evenings.

Yeah I listen to it all.

I'm enjoying not having to listen to other people. For once I'm doing really well and I'm enjoying myself.

Last time I went away like this I checked in and I guess not doing that this time is making this all worthwhile.

I'm going to be out and about again just haven't decided when yet. I guess that's for God to decide. But much is about to change sooooo I hope the world is ready. I'm continuing on my journey to be a better me.

Starting over fresh, in every way possible.

One love.

Rambling Mind

Yesterday was a big day for me, I mean it was a very BIG day for me. I now have all the money needed for summer school, which is a blessing because I didn't think I'd have it.

Any who, today is going to be pretty intense. I have a presentation that I have to do entirely in Spanish. Yes, it's my minor but geesh! I'm not the greatest speaker of Spanish, I'm still in the learning phase.

I'm looking into moving soon. I need a change of scenery. I went and checked out some lofts downtown, very nice.

I just want something to call entirely my own ya know.

I'm planning my pizza party for my students that made the honor roll. I told them if they made honor roll we'd have pizza and a movie. They worked hard so I'm going to reward them.

I got to talk to my brother. He's doing just fine over there in the sandbox. Keeps telling me to send him fried chicken.

He so greedy.

Lately I've been thinking a lot about becoming a part of something on campus. I feel like it's time for me to make a change here. I've gotten over being the new transfer and I'm ready to show people just what I'm made of.

I'm heavily contemplating the day on which I'm going to cut my hair because it's time. I'm going to go extremely short with my cut and let it grow back healthy.

Big Chop time!!!!!

It's so much going on in my head I can't seem to get all my thoughts out on paper, well on the screen???

I do have some serious things I want to discuss with you all. Later for that though, it's a lot going on around me.

Attention: Missing Blog?!

I'm missing a blog... isn't that crazy. It's just gone! I get online respond to the comment, get off line and it's gone. Hopefully my computer and blogspot are having a temporary issue with one another because ummmm yea, I want my blog back.

HELP ME WITH MY HOMEWORK!!!!!

OKAY BLOGGERS AND GUESTS I NEED A HUGE FAVOR.

I AM WRITING A DEFINITION PAPER FOR MY EXPOSITORY WRITING CLASS AND I NEED YOUR OPINION OR WHAT YOUR DEFINITION OF THE WORD LOVE IS.

THANKS SO MUCH!!!!

Sex Drive

My mind is on SEX! That's it. I mean that is not it but that's it.

I have other things on my mind but more than likely no matter what I'm doing or thinking about my mind is still on SEX!

Isn't that horrible. My body is yearning so bad that if I could have my way. I'd be getting some right now.

I mean, not just some random rough sex.

I want some passionate, slow deep strong love.

That's it. Thats what I want, some love making time.

Something with some meaning behind it.

Ugh!!!! Where is the good doctor when I need him????